


storm-tossed

by demonicneonfishy



Series: february angst-fest (febuwhump 2021) [14]
Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: M/M, Searching for Quynh | Noriko, no idea how to tag this as usual!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:00:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29438637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonicneonfishy/pseuds/demonicneonfishy
Summary: “You want to just give up?”“It has been decades, Andromache. We have not found her.”
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: february angst-fest (febuwhump 2021) [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2141784
Kudos: 35





	storm-tossed

**Author's Note:**

> day 14 of febuwhump 2021  
> prompt: "i didn't mean it."

Two years after their last possible connection to Quynh dies, Yusuf goes overboard.

It’s dark; there’s a storm; he shouldn’t have been on deck. It’s nobody’s fault but his own.

He manages to keep his head above water for the most part, which is a blessing. But there are some terrifying moments when the waves drag him under, when he loses sight of which way is up, and imagines meeting the same fate as Quynh, drowning over and over and over.

When he breaks the surface again, gasping for air, the rain lashing at him, the wind screaming something that sounds like his name - no, not the wind. Nico, screaming for him.

“Nicoló!” he screams back with as much energy as he can muster. “Nicoló, I’m here!”

He catches sight of Nicoló, leaning as far over the railing as he can, and waves his arms frantically. He knows the moment Nicoló sees him too, his lips forming Yusuf’s name, voice stolen by the wind.

He tries to swim to the ship against the current, until he’s close enough that Nicoló can throw him a rope. He grabs the end of it and wraps it around his hands three times, to minimise the chance of it slipping away from him.

Slowly, slowly, they haul him back towards the ship, until they can drag him onto the deck. He collapses into Nicoló’s arms, coughing, and Nicoló holds him tightly, sobbing and whispering in at least three different languages.

“Below,” Andromache shouts, and Nicoló helps him to his feet. They stumble into the relative safety of their cabin, and do not let go of each other until morning, until the storm passes.

* * *

“No more,” Nicoló tells Andromache the next morning.

She stares at him disbelievingly. “What do you mean  _ no more _ ?”

“I mean we cannot continue. Not like this.”

“You want to just give up?”

“It has been  _ decades _ , Andromache. We have not found her.”

“And we won’t, if we stop searching-”

“At what cost? What else do we risk losing to the waves? I know what you have lost, but we cannot lose anyone else.”

“You know  _ nothing _ of what I have lost,” Andromache hisses, standing up abruptly. “You may be prepared to give up on her, Nicoló, but I will not.”

Without another word, she storms away and out onto the deck.

“We can’t stop, Nico,” Yusuf says quietly.

“We have to.”

“She’s  _ drowning  _ down there, over and over-”

“And I almost lost you, last night, and I will not take that risk again,” Nicoló says firmly. 

“And you’re willing to leave her behind? You really care that little for her?”

He regrets it almost as soon as the words leave his mouth.

“I didn’t mean it,” he tries.

Nicoló shakes his head. “No, you did. It’s not because I don’t care for her, Yusuf. It’s because I care too much for you and Andromache to lose you too.”

“And if it was me in the coffin instead of her, you would give up so easily?”

Nicoló flinches. “Do not ask me that, please.”

“Why not?” He knows it’s not fair. And at the same time, he has to know.

“Because I do not know what I would do if it were you trapped under there. But last night you almost  _ were _ . I thought you were gone. We can return to the search in time, but… she has died so many times, Yusuf. She may have reached her final death. We could be risking ourselves for nothing.”

“And if she hasn’t? You’d be willing to leave her?”

“I do not  _ want _ to stop, but we have to. If only for a little while.” He looks at Yusuf, his expression pained. “I cannot lose you. Or Andromache. Our last lead died two years ago. We have searched for so long, and we have found nothing.”

Neither of them speak for a while.

“If it were me,” Nicoló says, a little shakily. “I would not want you to keep searching. If it meant you risked yourselves.”

“It’s  _ not _ you, though,” Yusuf says. And maybe that’s not fair either. 

Nicoló sighs and looks away. 

Part of Yusuf agrees with him, knows that they could search forever and never find her, and the other wants so badly to find his lost sister. He doesn’t know what to do.

The door slams open, making Yusuf jump, and Andromache enters, dropping into one of the chairs and taking a long drink.

“Nico’s right,” she says, setting the bottle down. She sounds so resigned, older and more exhausted than Yusuf’s ever seen her.

“What?” he asks.

“What?” Nicoló echoes.

“We can’t keep doing this,” she continues. “She- she wouldn’t want it to happen to anyone else, and-”

_ And it nearly did _ .

“We take a break for a few years. Maybe, in time, we’ll be able to search more efficiently, but... for now, we start heading for land.”

Yusuf and Nicoló look at each other, then back at Andy, whose eyes are filling with tears. She stands and walks towards them, and they pull her into a tight embrace, all three holding each other, unwilling to let go.

**Author's Note:**

> remember tommy from day 3 (a little hope)? in my mind he's the 'last connection' that dies but interpret it how you wish  
> -  
> i'm demonicneonfishy on tumblr too if you wanna come say hi!! (or yell at me for the angst)


End file.
